As the moon slid out of sight this morning, this side of the coast began their morning rituals. A bagel plus coffee at a nearby drive-thru. Traffic jams in that certain part of town. Dropping the kids off at the daycare. Sales meetings at 8:00. And so our day began. We each have those specific rituals that come rain or shine- we will adhere to. And yet even before our eyes opened, He knew the plan. He knew when our feet would hit the ground. When the coffee would spill and cause a hectic morning. He knew that tired looking girl would be standing at that corner again. The fact that we had a disappointing email waiting was no surprise to Him. He knew the path our feet would take throughout the day as our steps were simply following His plan.
With that thought in mind, I began my commute this morning. Bebo Norman and Leigh Nash were singing that powerful duet Beautiful Scandalous Night and I was busy scarfing breakfast-on-the-run. My mind was racing ahead to the Mortgage meeting, to the fact that our staff was short today, to the fact that I needed to do laundry tonight, to the fact that I needed to pay bills, etc.
Something caught my eye and I glanced down to see that my gaslight was still on. I have this habit of pressing the mileage meter whenever my light comes on so that I know exactly how many miles I have until I really need to freak out. My Camry manual says that I have 50 miles left when the light comes on and the closest I’ve been has been 44. That day, the car began choking on me at that point and I had to coast into the gas station. So, I swallowed hard when I saw 42 on the meter. I was about 10 miles from the nearest exit and even if I took that exit I had no idea where I’d be going. My mind began racing even more and I began thinking what if. I’m not strong enough to push the car by myself, my cell phone is dead in this stretch of the interstate, three rapes have taken place in this area in the past month (and the guy hasn’t been caught), and since we are short at work then it’s imperative that I arrive on time!
To be honest, my eyes began tearing up and I felt that flutter in my stomach that meant sobbing could occur at any moment. I was scared. Then I began the mental game of calming myself down. God knows where you are. This isn’t a surprise to you. He could add some extra gas in there if He wanted to. Wow. That’d be cool. I wonder if it’d be the same type. You think weird things when stressed.
I decided that I would stop watching the meter scroll higher and that I would just focus on getting to the next exit. Finally, I reached that exit. And when I crested the hill, I found no gas station. Not even a town. It was just an exit into a bunch of country roads. My heart sank, and I bit my lip and felt the tears start pouring. It was over fifteen miles to the next exit and I had no choice but to head off into the country roads and find a gas station. Five minutes later, (I still hadn’t got up the nerve to look at the meter) I found a road that listed a nearby city on it. So, I headed out to the city- not knowing where I was at all. No longer was I just praying please let me make it to a station but I was also praying please let me find my way back to the interstate.
Each wind of the road showed me an old mill, run down houses, car lots, grocery stores, but no gas stations. I was crossing some railroad tracks when a thought crossed my mind. I wonder if there would be a gas station behind the railroad tracks. I craned my neck around to see the most beautiful towering sign that read Phillips 66. I whipped my car around and flew up the road. Not only did I practically squeal when I got out of my car, I almost hugged the clerk as well.
When I got back into my car, my meter read 58.
So, He knew the plan. His reason for stretching my faith might have been simply so I would remember that He is in control. Maybe it was to remind me that when the days ahead hold looming clouds of darkness and my fear is for more than an empty gas tank- that if He cares when the small things frighten me, He most certainly will hold me in the storm.
All in all, I must say that my heart rests easier when I remember that there is a plan.