Being quite proud of the three page list I created, we took off to the grocery store last night. I was also proud that I finished my food plan for the next two weeks. But my pride shrunk quite a bit when we reached the checkout line and realized that I’d left the ability to FUND these purchases at home on the dining room table. And so I humbly dashed home and dashed back. We now have food. We will survive.
But the only thing I regret is that I ignored my PLAN first thing this morning and promptly had a semi-interesting quesadilla, chocolate fudge ripple ice cream, a slice of Drew’s birthday cake, and a glass of chocolate milk. And that was just for breakfast. As you can see, I’m doing really well with self-control.
You’d think that after eating all of that, something would snap (besides my pants) and I’d get a CLUE that not only do I need help but I also need to take the first step. But it wasn’t until my darling and patient husband sent me an article on depression this morning that something snapped in my head and I finally figured out that I really do have to make the first step.
The article mentioned that a few key signs of depression are:
▪ Daily sadness
▪ Loss of interest in activities previously enjoyed
▪ Restless, anxious or irritable behavior
▪ Trouble concentrating, focusing or remembering
▪ Excessive weariness and lethargy
▪ Sleeping or eating too much or too little
▪ Unexplained aches and pains
▪ Thoughts of suicide or death
And that’s when I made an appointment with my doctor for Tuesday morning. Because I’ve had ALL of those symptoms. And I have spent too much of my life believing that depression isn’t real and that imbalances are only because you aren’t doing something right in the eyes of God.
I owe it to Drew to figure this monster out.