The Greater Easley Chamber of Commerce presented my company with the Business of the Month award this afternoon. We stood on the front steps of our building while the cameras flashed. I’m sure our large sign and fake smiles were a lovely addition to the ceremony. Of course this was the morning that I decided to straighten my hair. When I came back in from the ceremony, my hair was curly. And wet.
Oh, the things we do for publicity’s sake.
jennifer: i just feel very burdenless. of course, when i wake up in the morning- there could be a large sack waiting for me at my bedroom door.
jennifer: stupid sack.
amber: then kill the sack right now. say outloud that the sack cannot exist because God has your burdens. any stupid sack that shows up at your bedroom door in the morning is only going to be laundry that is taking over your room.
When I opened my front door this morning, the sun was blazing across the pasture and the breeze was gentle but cool. It looked to be an incredibly beautiful Easter day. So when Amber and I were driving to church this morning and a few sprinkles of rain began dancing on the windshield, I was a little surprised. In less than a few minutes, the sky gathered a few dark clouds together and threatened to spill. Of course, I’ve lived here for almost 23 years and you’d think I would be used to South Carolina weather. We don’t need meteorologists. Keeping an upward glance is best. Being prepared.
While thinking on those things, I was surprised at how close it parallels my heart right now. I’ve been a Christian for over 18 years now and you would think that through the ups and downs I would have learned two of the basics of the faith. Keeping an upward glance is best. Always be prepared. In the past few weeks, I’ve been absolutely appalled at a few things that have slipped into my soul. There were no dramatic moments. Just little creeping in. It’s very true that we never know what each day will hold and I’ve been sadly surprised lately. My days have been full of things that show a slip in character. There’s been a pattern in my stumbling.
And so I’ve come face to face with myself. It’s entirely despairing to see yourself as God sees you. He knows it all. He sees it all. He knows the intents. While reading in Proverbs this afternoon, I found a verse that I’ve memorized many times but this is the first time that it has awoken a chord within my soul.
Preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck. Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble. When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared. (Proverbs 3:21-26)
My days will still be full of trouble unless I take this to heart. Seek wisdom. Stay sensitive to the Spirit. The most obvious way to keep from stumbling is that sweet, habitual fellowship with the Lord. How easy it is to stay busy and to fill my hours with unnecessary things. But I’m so weary of losing my footing. I crave steady feet.
Rejoice.
Nicholas Sparks shares a childhood memory in his new book entitled Three Weeks with My Brother.
One day, we spotted a raven in the trees, and were instantly captivated. We began following it as it moved from tree to tree….Pretty soon, we weren’t able to go anywhere near the school without seeing the raven. It was always around. The raven, we soon realized, was following us.
We began to feed it….and the raven grew more comfortable with us. We named the raven Blackie. Blackie was great. Blackie was cool. Blackie, we eventually discovered, was a monster. As interested as we were in the bird, we found out that the bird had become far more interested in us. Particularly our hair. Because we were blond, our hair gleamed in the sunlight, and ravens, we came to discover, love shiny things.
We were at the school one afternoon when Blackie suddenly came swooping towards us, diving at our heads over and over, like a fighter plane attacking a ship. Blackie swooped down and landed on my head, which was quite simply the most terrifying thing ever to happen to me in my young life. I panicked, unable to breathe, unable to move a muscle. I could feel Blackie’s claws digging into my head, and- as if to amplify the horror- Blackie began to peck hard, its head bobbing up and down like the oil pumps in Oklahoma. I screamed. Blackie pecked harder. And that’s how it went. Peck, scream. Peck, scream. Peck, scream. Peck, scream.
His story reminded me of a terrible trauma that occurred when I was a child.
The afternoon was filled with balloons, cake, and fun as Jon celebrated his 7th birthday. We were all gathered at my Granny’s house, eating, laughing and doing the weird things that kids do. At someone else’s prompting, the kids went outside to play and we began a rambunctious chase through the green grass. I was squealing as Jon and David chased me through the yard when the monster of the skies began circling in the clouds.
We saw the shadow on the ground, heard the shrill cries, and looked up to see a bird overhead. I’m not sure if it was the fear of the unknown, or the panicky tone of Jon’s screaming, but I turned pale white and scrunched my eyes shut tightly.
But the fear and panicky tone was nothing compared to the intense pain I felt when the bird swooped down and attached itself to my hair. It had landed in my blond curls and would absolutely not let go. I remember weeping, shouting for my daddy, and then seeing my Papa rush out of the house waving a large laundry basket in the air. Jon was shouting, “It’s a baby eagle!” Mom was screaming, “Stanley, get that bird out of her hair!” Dad was just sort of laughing, I think. But Papa sure didn’t think it was too funny.
In an attempt to knock the bird off of my head, he clobbered me in the head with the laundry basket and I fell to the ground, crying. The bird finally let go of my hair and they kept it under the basket for a very long time. As punishment. Well, actually, it was more like what on earth do we do with this bird?
Pretty Bird (why on earth they chose to name the monster that, I’ll never know) ended up living at Granny’s house until last year. She woke up one morning and he was just lying in the bottom of the cage.