octolilly [through the years]

Share a recipe or meal that is a summertime favorite. – Amy

We love an extremely light and easy macaroni salad on hot summer nights! And when I say easy, I mean extremely easy. A box of noodles, 2 or 3 cups of peas, a pile of shredded chicken, 1/2 cup mayo, and 1/3 cup of mustard. Salt and pepper to taste.

List 8 reasons it’s okay to lie. – Katrina

1. Pleasantries! When my grocer asks how I’m doing then I’m more than likely going to respond with “fine” instead of “I cried all morning because I didn’t feel like driving to the gas station to get chocolate ice cream because I’m PMSing and I need chocolate and I feel achy all over and I hate those fuzzy things that fly through the air and keep making me sneeze and I love to wax philosophical over Sister Wives with Daniel even when he’s barely paying me any attention.”

2. When the truth tears someone down, hurting them. I do believe honesty is healing, refreshing, and more than likely the best policy. And just because the truth hurts someone doesn’t mean that lying is the right answer. However, there are situations in which telling the truth helps no one at all and can even seem rather selfish in a I-need-to-get-this-off-my-chest type of way.

3. Complimenting someone. Perhaps this stems from my southern kindness (bless your heart!) but white lies of your hair has never looked more beautiful or darling, this potato salad recipe is better than anything I’ve ever tried are perfectly acceptable.

4. To keep the peace (when you can’t possibly change the situation). An example of this would be my polite side-stepping issues with my Granny who will never understand anything I say about some things. I respect her, love her, and know that I can never change her or change her ideas about me. So I side-step, white-lie, and keep the peace.

5. Your height and weight on your driver’s license. I think trying to cut forty pounds off your license is silly (but go ahead, hee!) but no one cares if you choose what you weighed in February instead of what you weighed yesterday morning after eating that box of donuts.

6. When someone texts you “what are you doing” and you are pooing. ‘Nuff said? Unless you’re cool with using that poo icon while texting.

7. Santa, The Tooth Fairy, etc. We’ve told Drew that there are stories we all tell about certain holidays and some people believe they are real and some people don’t. We let him choose how he wants to think about it and if he is in pretend mode, we jump into that mode too. Thus, we lie about whether a fairy is going to army crawl into his bedroom and pull his teeth with pliers. Wait, what?

8. “Do I look fat?” This completely depends on your relationship with the person who is asking. More than likely, you should say no unless that person’s weight is bothering you and then you actually need to have a heart-to-heart about it. I tease Daniel with this question at the worst times and try to convince him that it’s perfectly acceptable to say, “why yes, sweetie. Because you are.” He just gives me a flirty wink and says “you look beautiful.” FINE. WHATEVER MAN.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this June. If you want to join in, feel free!

What did people tease you about growing up? – Niki

The only stark memory I have of being dreadfully teased while growing up was when I attempted to shape my eyebrows as a freshman in high school.

You see, I didn’t use tweezers. I shaved the edges off my eyebrows until I had tiny tufts left. Why? WHY NOT. No, really, I have no idea. But I did learn my lesson. The laughter that followed me around for months (my peers mocked me less than the grownups did!) was painful.

But the teasing was completely justified.

Come up with a new Constitutional Amendment. – Art and Soul

1. The Environmental Rights Amendment. Every person should have the right to clean air and water.

2. The Voting Rights Amendment. All citizens, over the age of 18, have the right to vote. All elections must be undertaken using a system that includes a permanent non-electronic ‘paper trail’. Citizens may lose their right to vote if they are imprisoned, but that right will be restored to them upon their release, regardless of probation or parole status.

3. The Equality Amendment. Marriage rights and benefits for same-sex couples.

4. The Healthcare Amendment. The Federal Government shall create, fund and administer an ongoing system to provide free healthcare to each American citizen as they shall require such care.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this June. If you want to join in, feel free!

Who are your role models? – Dana

I pace the floor with this question.

I spent years cramming the girl I was becoming into the mold of a girl whose world had already been charted for her. It was expected to emulate those around you who were Right. Role Models were those who had not messed up. They had a “testimony” which hadn’t been mussed.

On the other side of freedom from religion, I finally have the chance to chart my own way. To learn from my own mistakes. And I have stopped following anyone and anything blindly.

Perhaps I should have learned early on that it is all right for role models to be flawed, but I did not. Any failure I saw in those whom I held in high esteem, broke my heart. It meant that they were not “fit for service” and they were doomed to be “put on the shelf.”

All this lingo. I’m sorry. It’s just in my blood.

Is it important for children to have role models? And/or for us grown-ups to have role models?

I don’t know. Maybe it depends on if you are simply looking at people for inspiration or if you are attempting to echo their journey perfectly. The danger being in the latter.

There most certainly are people who inspire me!

My family is full of people who have traversed horrible situations, worked through intense heartbreak, and still kept a smile on their face and a purpose to do the best they can do no matter what is happening. My parents truly inspire me with their hard work, open hearts, and genuine love for me (and my boys).

And there are also people whom I admire for various reasons who strike a chord in my heart and cause me to dream big. Some of my well-known favorites are: Jane Goodall, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Julia Sweeney, Neil Gaiman, Meryl Streep, and Jennifer Hudson.

Perhaps my true role model is the person I imagine I want to be. And each learning place is a small step towards becoming her.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this June. If you want to join in, feel free!

With what fictional character (book, movie, TV, etc.) do you most identify? Why? – Kristen

I move from window to window. The rain drizzles, we paint, we eat cake, and I contemplate dumping the rest of the cake in the trash because it’s making me crazy but it’s RED VELVET CAKE and I would hate myself even more for wasting such loveliness. So I nibble the cake, watch the rain, and ponder all the delightful characters I’ve swooned over in books, movies, and TV. It’s one thing to swoon and then another to bite your lip, swallow the lump in your throat, and see yourself. Often in a way you’d rather not.

As the girl, and now woman, who daily stumbles over the fine line of being mischievous and just “quirky”, I see the sneaky and outspoken Anne Shirley. When I was twelve, my family sat around a meal of scrabble and spaghetti one evening that turned into an episode of Jennifer-doesn’t-know-when-to-stop. Our laughter was in full force. Deep belly laughs that had tears streaming down our cheeks. Wise Dad finally said, “you should really stop or you are going to get choked.” And ever the precocious brat, I replied WHILE CHOKING, “you should really stop or you are going to get choked!” Yes, I was twelve but this proved to be a theme in the coming years. I just don’t know when to stop.

Daniel can tell you story after story of moments just like those. It’s endearing to imagine myself as a little old lady who just doesn’t know when to stop being so mischievous and outspoken but maybe I should at least pretend to have myself under control while attempting to parent. Maybe.

My forever infatuation with Betsy Ray prompted a love of writing, dreaming, and gave me just a taste of feminism without even knowing what it was. We’ve both hid to write, collected myriads of blank books just hoping to spill all the words we ever thought upon them, and discovered that staying true to oneself is what is most important.

I also wear my heart on my sleeve like Kaylee from Firefly. And I yearn to see the world rationally like Temperance Brennan from Bones.

Now I just want to eat more cake and read while it rains.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this June.