List 10 things you would never do. – Katrina
Really? Just ten things? Does this mean if I don’t include it on this list then I WILL do it at some point? Because I plan on never chopping all of my finger tips off. I also don’t think I’ll gargle with buttermilk at any point in my life. And I really doubt that I’ll ever attempt to milk a spider.
I can keep going. Well, actually, I’m going to need to sit and recover after thinking about milking a spider.
Here are my ten things that have Glaring Red Flags attached to them:
1. Get Lasik surgery. I know people who have had it and LOVE it. But for me, the minor inconvenience of wearing glasses or contacts will never outweigh the possible complications from the surgery.
2. Become a hoarder. Although I do enjoying watching the show (and the immediate cleaning spree that follows), I could never live like that. I don’t have that much sentimentality towards the things I do have so I will never have piles of magazines, cards, porcelain dolls, or trash just because I can’t part with it. I can actually part with things a little too easy. I deleted 20 GB of music off my hard-drive a few days ago (cue fight with Daniel!) after needing some space. I did regret that the next day though.
3. Skydive. Once again, I know people who have done this and you can just see their eyes sparkling. They had a blast. But I know I would have a panic attack on the plane and probably pass out. I’m all for zip-lining and parasailing but no skydiving.
4. Get into a tanning bed. I’m as pale as a piece of paper and normally wear translucent makeup. I’m happy being pale! Having a tan is not worth skin cancer.
5. Stop eating fried okra. Thankfully, my family introduced me to fried okra when I was a wee lass. The best way to eat it is to spread it on the inside of a biscuit (with a bit of mashed potatoes). Who’s the girl trying to lose weight? Yes, that’s me! I’ll raise my hand!
6. Go to a Nascar event. There is no way I will ever, ever, ever, ever spend time watching cars race around a track with a crowd of drunk rednecks. This may be a problem though because my son loves spinning, wheels, spinning, wheels, spinning, and did I mention wheels? I’m not planning on telling him about Nascar for a long time. Shhhh.
7. Dress up as a puppet. It took me years to get over my aversion to puppets. But to actually pretend to BE ONE? Let me go lie down with a cold washcloth on my face. I’m about to catch the vapors.
8. Smoke a cigarette. The smell of cigarettes makes me gag. I know it’s one of the hardest things to quit so I’m glad I never tried smoking.
9. Scream at my child in public: I’m not talking about screaming because he’s about to run in front of a fork lift at Home Depot. I’m talking about “disciplining” in the middle of the grocery store. I’ve seen this happen three times and each time I wanted to swoop in and rescue the child. It was absolutely horrible. Maybe that little boy was being a complete snot and had bugged his mom all day and maybe the mom had just lost her job, was suffering with a migraine, and limping along on a broken toe but none of those things justify screaming at the top of your lungs to your five year old son. Especially over the fact that he accidentally bumped into you again.
10. Enjoy scary movies: Nope. Nope. Nope. I can barely handle Doctor Who at times. I watch it – I just watch it behind a pillow. I’m not the only one, right? Right? Hello?
I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more.
